Customer:      Worcester sauce please mate...

 

Shop Keeper:  Sorry can't, it's off the shelves, cancer scare.

 

C:                Oh right, uh Chinese Chicken Wings?

 

SK:               Ah that's the same mate, cancer scare

 

C:                Hamburger Relish?

 

SK:               Cancer scare

 

C:                Sausage and Mash?

 

SK:                Cancer scare

 

C:                Cottage Pie?

 

SK:               Aye, ...no wait, cancer scare.

 

C:                So they're all off the shelves because of a cancer scare?

 

SK:               Yup.

 

C:                Jaysus, that's mad, just give me a packet of fags then.

 

SK:               No bother.  £5.00 please mate.