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What's the definition of the bravest
man in the world??
>
> The man
who comes home drunk, covered in lipstick and smelling of
>
> perfume,
then slaps his wife on the backside and says: "You're next,
>
> fatty."
>
>
********************************
>
> Man
walks into the bedroom with a sheep under his arm while his wife is
>
> lying in
bed reading.
>
> Man
says: "This is the pig I have sex with when you've got a headache."
>
> Wife
replies: "I think you'll find that is a sheep."
>
> Man
replies: "I think you'll find I was talking to the sheep."
>
>
********************************
>
> A man
walks into his bedroom and sees his wife packing a suitcase.
>
> He asks,
"What are you doing?"
>
> She
answers, "I'm moving to London.
>
> I heard
prostitutes there get paid £400 for doing what I do for you for
>
> free."
>
> Later
that night, on her way out, the wife walks into the bedroom and
>
> sees her
husband packing his suitcase.
>
> When she
asks him where he's going, he replies, "I'm coming too I want
>
> to see
how you live on £800 a year".
>
>
*********************************
>
> A woman
was shopping at her local supermarket where she selected: 2
>
> litres
of low fat milk, a carton of eggs, 2 litres of orange juice, a
>
> head of
lettuce, half a dozen tomatoes, a 500g jar of coffee, a 250g
>
> pack of
bacon
>
> As she
was unloading her items on the conveyor belt to check out, a
>
> drunk
standing behind her watched as she placed the items in front of
>
> the
cashier.
>
> While
the cashier was ringing up her purchases, the drunk calmly
>
>
stated,"You must be single."
>
> The
woman was a bit startled by this proclamation, but she was intrigued
>
> by the
derelict's intuition, since she was indeed single. She looked at
>
> her six
items on the belt and saw nothing particularly unusual about her
>
>
selections that could have tipped off the Drunk to her marital status.
>
>
Curiosity getting the better of her, she said, "Well, you know what,
>
> you're
absolutely correct. But how on earth did you know that?"
>
> The
drunk replied, "Cos you're ugly."
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